Become a Trusted Advisor
Yesterday I had the opportunity to see an old friend. Tommy Mygrant and I met at my first Coach Summit in 2009 and he’s one of the people who showed me how to become a trusted advisor.
At the 2009 Summit, Tommy was a finalist in what was then known as the Million Dollar Body Game (now The Beachbody Challenge). He was [understandably) very nervous as he competed to win $250,000. Heck, I was nervous for him! I was also nervous for another reason. (I had a fairly serious case of social anxiety just a few short years ago and being around all those people I didn’t know drove me bit crazy.) Somehow Tommy and I ended up talking until about 3:30 in the morning.
He told me a lot about his life and what he’d been through. This meant a lot to me, because he was one of the first people that I was able to simply let talk. Yep, I just shut up and let him talk. Tommy has gone on to become somewhat of a superstar in Beachbody. I’m so proud of what he’s accomplished and the man he has become. The brief times we get to spend together are really special to me, because he’s someone I feel close to despite living far apart and not getting much opportunity to talk.
One of the things Tommy said during our conversation moved me. “Become a trusted advisor.” We all need trusted advisors in our lives. Sometimes they do simple things like recommending a great doctor, lawyer, restaurant, or product. Sometimes they are the example that we need to follow. Sometimes they help us correct our course when we stray off of it. Sometimes they are the shoulder we need to cry on. A bona fide trusted advisor will be all of these things at some point during a relationship. In any case, we all need trusted advisors.
So, how do you become a trusted advisor? There are two important parts to this equation:
- Being trustworthy and trusted
- Being an advisor
Trust is the foundation of every relationship. The easiest way to gain trust is to place the needs of other people ahead of your own. Being other-focused is the key to establishing trust. Of course, loyalty is imperative to trust as well. The easiest way to show someone you care about their life is to listen more than you talk and keep it to yourself. When people understand you have their best interests in mind, they will trust you.
You’re likely to have people telling you a lot of intimate things when they trust you. However, if you don’t give them any advice, you’ll never become a trusted advisor. You’ll remain a trusted listener. Don’t be afraid to give people advice. They are telling you about their lives because they need it, so don’t run from this opportunity to be influential. Keep the advice relevant, honest and reasonable.
Click on the link below to listen to my podcast on how to become a trusted advisor.
As always, you know I’m always available to be your trusted advisor. You can reach me here: